How have you been A.

​
How have you been, A.
Still in distress until today, you ignored me without explaining a word.

​​Upset, but never was I mad at you.
IDK. What happened in between? 

I'm just trying to move on from all of this. I cared for you A, I never called or bugged you during your work because of the not-so-strong-internet coverage, different working hours, but I endure because I know your nature of job.

You promised to see me as soon as you came back. I waited for you to come home. I trusted you & I realised now that was a mistake. But its too late now.

​
I feel like I've lost a friend. A friend I could tell anything about.
Who do I tell my sometimes-sucky-work to? or my beautiful morning breakfast?​

​
W​e shared a lot of things together. I still feel we could have been something. But I know its too late now.
 

I questioned myself each day A, why ​was it her that you chose?​

I hope one day you'll come to your senses and explain to me.

But in case not, you're not the person I thought you were.

Good luck in life, A.

I'll never forget you, thanks for being part of my life.

 

I missed you. everyday.

(remember you said the same thing to me?)​

--
​

​yours forever faithful.

the girl you really hurt.

 

 

J.K

1. What a great unplanned weekend I had. This post only came out today (a Friday) as I was really busy with this incoming rig that I caught myself a few times forgetting to go to the loo.
2. Idk how to describe how Saturday Midnight to Sunday Evening was, but it was one hell of a feeling.
3. One thing is for sure, this is not falling on the idea of love, but I think I'm in love.
4. But it left me with this curiosity on a girl named J, who called him twice straight. Could it be it? Another girl he is seeing at the moment? IDK.
6. But the signals he is giving.
7. Could this be one of those moments where He wants you to get hints ? Him. Showing His signs.
8. I wish I can explain this situation, let alone decide what I should do.

Till then.
Tootles.

Self-Help Articles / Posts

The thing about self-help articles is that, you can very much relate your situation with the people who comment and share their stories there.
Their experiences help us through click with ours. They speak a language only we understand because everyone is going through the same feelings, at different levels and situation.

Sometimes, their stories are even worse than ours, but it doesn't kill the fact that well, it hurts.

.

'And the worst of it all was that you weren't able to make him happy even though you did your best to make him feel special...' - Anonymous

What good is living, if your presence have no impact on another human being

This is where I'm reaching out one of those memory box in my head and thinking about it.
The closest thing to the subject.

I remember when my ex-bf told me he wanted me back, one of the reasons he said was ; I've become
another person since I met you, you've changed a part of me, and I've changed for the better
person in me.

I was touched.
But it didn't make me stay.
I don't know why. It just felt that way.

If you bring out the best in someone even if he's not gonna be with you through the end, at least he can be the best for the next person / or the person he is in love with now, even if it's not you.

Why

Have you ever felt that as though the world is turning back on you.

Please give me strength. 

Choices

Choices. 

You make choices everyday. 

The ones you make today will effect what will you turn out to be in future. 

The ones you made yesterday is the outcome of today.

So choose wisely. 

I chose to give attention on things that matter most now and the priorities. 

I chose to be happy. I chose not to be with anyone to make me happy. 

I have to be happy on my own and love myself only then to share it with someone else. 

I want to start something new, turnover a new leaf for a new year. 

Bismillah. 

Super Relieved

So, Mum said I had too much clothes. I didn't believe it at first because I had 2 wardrobes. One in my real home and the second one in Puncak Alam ( Rental House). I just started realizing it when I brought home all my clothes and took out everything out from the luggage. Quite surprising I must say because I keep wearing the same clothes every time I go out. *We all have that favorite shirt we always wear. Please say you can relate to what I'm saying*

So I decided that today I'm going to do some 'spring clean' to my wardrobe. Giving away the ones that are too small that when I wear makes me look like I'm wearing my nieces t-shirt, the ones that makes me look like granny Elaine most of them are the vintage ones that I thought was cool to be wearing but eventually not, and the ones which I feel uncomfortable wearing thick wool fabrics because yes, I am living in a tropical weather country. I don't need to be all warm.

Got tips from Oprah's show the other day. Saying :
If you don't wear a certain clothes in 3 months time, it means you're not going to wear it at all.

So every time I pull out a piece, I try to remember when was the last time I wore it. If it was more than 3 months ago, that piece, has got to go. 

Since I was planning to give away the clothes and not throwing them away, I didn't really think much about 'giving' which used to be my favorite pieces because I know they will land in good hands or to those who will appreciate it more than I do.
After hours of cleaning. Guess what? It all came up to 4 medium sized plastic bags. *what a load*
Only now I believe what Mum was trying to say. I did have too much clothes I don't wear.

It feels good to see your closet clean and simple. You should try it too. Who knows, you might find your long lost favorite sweater that you accused your sister had stolen it from you 2 years ago. Hi hi.


p/s: There is a possibility I might be going shopping since some pieces I found don't match. Teehee.

Welcoming February

February comes from the word Februum which means Purification.

Therefore I am purifying myself for this month. But what shall I purify? U do not need to know that. I'll just keep that to myself.

What is interesting is that this year in February we have 29 days. Calls for a special date ayy?
Therefore, I challenge myself to do something crazy on this day. Well, maybe not as crazy but something different maybe than what I usually do.

Let's say I go on a date on that 29th, if it turns out bad. I have the next 4 years to recall that bad day. Hah!
But if it turns out to be a great date, well then, good for me.  The next date will be in 4 years time. *Gulp.


Anyway, I have a good feeling I'm going to enjoy February as much as you people will do.
InsyaAllah a better start. quit the laziness. read a book and finish it. and continue baking when bored. Oh and what else, yes, exercise more often.

Till then, Toodles.

Addicted. Addicted to?

♥

Ramadhan Stories

So I'm back out of nowhere in the blues to write down this post. It's the last 10 days of Ramadhan, which we call it the last 10 special days, which Muslims seek for Allah's blessings and forgiveness. Between these 10 nights, there is one night that is called Malam Lailatul Qadr.

Anyways, after so long I didn't go for Solat Terawikh, I finally had the heart to go tonight. I went  a little bit late after my parents and took the car by myself. I prayed only 8 rakaat as usual.
*Sometimes I feel we youngsters should be ashamed of ourselves for doing only 8 rakaat, those makcik who are more older than us can do 20 rakaat almost every night.

When I reached home, saw my dad's car park outside, thought to myself, wow, that was fast dad u reached home.

" Ayah, today you only did 8 rakaat? Tired is it?"

"No laa, I went back after Isya' prayers, diarrhea ( cirit birit) on my way to the toilet, habis jubah putih ayah."

I wanted to laugh, but I thought it was rude, then my sister laughed first, so then I continued on.
Haha seriously, my dad was also laughing when he explained it all.

10 mintues later, he said,
" Can u help me cut those papayas and also watermelons?"

-_-

errrr.....okay.

Choc Chip Cookies

Hey All.
I know I haven't been blogging for a while. I was a lil bit busy adjusting time since I cam back from Jakarta.
Ok, not to mention. I haven't unpacked a few stuffs. (i'm the worst at it)

So, since it's Ramadhan month, and I seemed to have a lot of free time, I decided to make a cookie sale!!

Chocolate Chip + Cadbury Chunks Cookies!

Yes, made from real cadbury choc. 

50 pcs for RM 20 

If u feel like ordering, just contact me okies. 

This is my facebook page : Inbox me :)

Safiza's Facebook

I deliver around Johor Bahru only.

Skype Skype

One of the best long-distance conversations at night.

Thank you.

malas. cape.

Hey what's up. A lot has been going on. Including our Jogja trip last week.
Still feel the tiredness.
Maybe I'll upload or make a post about it later.
Stay safe. Toodles.

Journey that's coming to an end

Indeed. Our journey here in Jakarta is coming to an end. *Picture above : Our farewell party. God, I hate this feeling. One minute you constantly feel happy wanting to be at home. Another minute dying wanting to stay. 9 Days left to be exact. I know we will miss our friends and lecturers mostly. Not to mention Binus Square. We   L-O-V-E it here with the swimming pool, gym, free laundry and air conditioner of course! Dah lemak sangat.

Now that we are leaving soon. There are a few things need to be done. Shopping for souvenirs of course. Shopping for the last time. ( I bought clogs the other day, and I'm worried about my excess luggage) and enjoying the food.  Sightseeing will come soon, of course. Can't wait! Take care y'all.

You make me smile

Hye. How was your weekend and your past weekdays. I've been constantly neglecting my blog. My final exam was my boyfriend for the past week. Can I hate him. Yes. Well since exams started, listening to songs helps a lot, especially when you're stressed out. My earphone and laptop don't really go well together. So Sheyra had to hear what I hear. Yes, I know last 2 months Sheyra told me to get a new playlist coz I know she can memorize the lyrics already, if you know what I mean. But, I didn't. Decided to download some other songs. Calming songs, Not those bang-bang- piu-piu songs. So I decided to make a my-exam playlist : 

1. Winter - Joshua Radin

2. True - Ryan Cabrera

3. Friend like you - J. Radin

4. *Paperweight - J.Radin

5. I wish you love - Rachael Yamagata 

6. The Scientist - Coldplay

7. This is the thing - Fink

8. Life is wonderful - Jason Mraz

9. Pink Floyd - Wish you were here

10. Angels on the moon - Thriving Ivory

So, if u say my playlist sucks, you suck.

Ha-Ha.

Sushi Tei Experience

Did I tell you how much I was really craving for sushi. Since I don't really like McDonalds and KFC that much anymore since I came here. The taste is a bit weird esp with their chilli sauce.

So yesterday Lily was quite stressed out after finishing her first paper for final exam, she decided to have a good dinner and I suggested we'd go to Sushi Tei.

For a while, I thought of wearing Japanese costume but I don't have one. Plus I know my friends wouldn't want to be walking with a lost Geisha in Indonesia. So I decided to wear this :

indirect communication

sometimes, we use this device to gossip.

only with girlfriends. mind you it's healthy gossip.

When they walk faster, I know they're excited about something.

Too hungry maybe?

Actually they were catching up on BVLGARI Jewelries. See how they strike the long face. 

Feel sorry for the boyfriends now for snapping this pic,now that your girlfriends want these in future.

While eating, Lily couldn't really find what she was looking for. Looking around, she saw the Heineken fridge and suddenly asked me:

"Can I drink tonight? I really want to drink beer." 

I said it was fine for me and Sheyra if she wanted to drink but we don't drink. She paused for a moment and said " It's OK, I will not drink because in Korea, no one drinks alone." 

Felt bad for her, and suggested that she should ask Hendra, next time, because we know he drinks. 

Of Course, in Korea drinking alcohol is something important and no one drinks alone. That's part of an enjoyment for them. :)

An ice cream for Crunky people :D

Now that my craving for Sushi has past. Let's find another one to fill this big stomach.

Any suggestions?

sawadee-kra

The day we say goodbye to the Thai sisters. It was sad.
We are approximately 23 days away from going home. The Thai's went home first.

Every one was sad to be apart. Andry of course our drama queen burst into tears before anyone. Can't remember how much he hugged the girls.

I hate this part right here. The goodbye part.
Took some photos together before they depart. They left us with a heavy heart.

The night before. Our last time hanging out.

Souveniers from Anthony for them.

we wish you the best in life. 

see you soon in Phuket 2012.

:)

This is too much

This is too much too handle. Yes. I'm talking about Korean Drama : Boys over Flower. 
Actually it should be my exams I have to worry about now. 


So we finished this semester's class last Friday with a presentation. Got a few negative comments. But, never-mind , it's part of learning. 
There's a saying : what kills you only makes you stronger, right? Yes, I believe that. Except smoking. Smoking kills you, but doesn't make you stronger. You'll die faster. *kriok


Watching too much of this Boys over flower episodes again and again and again makes me ponder, wonder and dream a lot.
Nur Lily said it's good for girls too watch but bad for boys as they have to become much more gentleman if the whole universe of women decide to watch this drama. To come to think of it,this is the 5th time I'm watching it.

I get moved so easily by the things the hero ( Gu Jun Pyo) does. Wonder if there are any other men  like him are still living in the world. Hey, guys, u can hate me, but I think it's the truth. 


I think men never open doors for women anymore, never cover a women with a his coat when she's cold. *Boo-ing to some men out there. Yes, hate me for the 2nd time.


Ok, I'm even getting carried away again by writing this post. Yes, this is what happens when you fantasized because the reality doesn't look like this anymore. This time, don't hate me. 

Hate Him : 

He doesn't look good in pictures that much, but I prefer to see him in action.

Mind you I'm not a fan of Korean drama's but this one, is something worth keeping in my laptop.

They also have it on Youtube if you decide to watch 

;)

Saturday Night Life

The spontaneous trip that one time.

Suppose to head to Nikko Hotel first then to KL Village for an awesome tummy-filling food. Instead, decided to change route to Plaza Indonesia first then to the hotel.

AND I BROUGHT 200,000 IDR only = MYR 60 to A HIGH-END MALL.
Ok overreacting, I could just survive if I don't buying anything actually.

We went for some sightseeing also near the mall. Barely could walk far as our energy level was thinning after window shopping and going ga-ga for shoes at the mall.

LV. Ahhhh.

Saw a man went into the fitting room. Which part do you not understand when they write 'women'.

Nur Lily was really happy, swipe swipe and swipe the credit card.

Not really window shopping. Erk.

   I kind of like the combination of my loafers with the cushion color. 

   Pastel green and pink defines me much. Green + Pink = GRINK.

Start Fresh

Ok, enough of sad stories and enough crying. I grief. I'm emotional but I have to find a better way to get through this. My friends are tired of seeing me cry. Ok maybe they don't see me cry, but they know I'm crying inside. They're my friends, they know me better than I know myself. Cool rasanya dapat kawan gini.

What's new? Rasanya dah lama tak blogwalking or whatever they call it... tup tap tup tap my favorite bloggers posted a few posts already.

I know I missed the gossip about the kid named Adinda Evans, the drama Nora Elena that everyone is going gaga over Seth Tan and what else? That's all I guess. Takde la ketinggalan pun.

by the way, am so happy that I got a charm bracelet I've been wanting a loooooong time.
Skali jumpa depan mata, beli terus. But it doesn't look exactly the one I want, but can laa.

the one i bought. score!

very much a girl's best friend. for now.